NOPE

Well, this isn’t what I wanted.

I’m grumpy and I don’t really want to go on about it, but it’s still related to unequal workload at home. And mental health challenges for both parents. And general frustration.

I felt my frustration. It’s there for a reason.

But on with what was GOOD today:

• Went for a 10.5km hike/walk at dawn at Black Hill Conservation Park. It was pretty. The steep hill isn’t so bad if you stop and take photos all the time because it’s so pretty (it’s also not so bad if you’ve been up it enough).
• Listened to a podcast about psilocybin. I definitely do not know how to calculate a dose of psilocybin now. Or how to use it in a therapeutic setting. Nope. Absolutely will not use that knowledge, ever.
• Cooked something. A proper something, with, like, moderate prep. I haven’t felt like I can do something like that for a while.
• Laundry away! 6 day streak!
• Kicked son and husband out of the house for a while. But it wasn’t as long as I wanted.
• No emotional flashbacks.
• Felt… pretty good. Only difficult emotions were to do with unequal workload. It’s not just that it’s unfair, it’s that the current situation in almost no way aligns with my values. And I’m struggling to do a lot about it.
• But I did try to get my husband to practice a little bit of emotional agility. I don’t think it worked, but I tried.

I also took some photos and found them disappointing. I think I’m getting all fancy with my photos, having taste and standards and stuff. Gross. I might need to put in effort or something. Awful. I much prefer blissful naïveté over serious artsy fartsy.